Health Professional #1

James and I decided that River needed to have a celiac test done. I scheduled an appointment for River to meet with someone at our doctor’s office. We met with a resident who agreed that we should have the testing done and sent us home with the requisition forms that we needed. I took a deep breath and headed right to the nearest lab. I knew that my daughter would not cope well with a blood test and I wanted to be done with it. Thankfully, I remembered before we arrived at the lab that a celiac test is all but useless for someone that has followed a gluten-free diet for well over a year. I can only hope the receptionist at my doctor’s office was fully able to capture the exact level of my irritation when she conveyed my feedback to the resident that saw us.

Health Professional #2

I requested another visit with a different doctor. At that appointment, I was told that I’d need to consult with the office dietician who would decide if we should be referred to the office pediatrician who would then decide if we should be sent to have a celiac test done. Um – what? Fine.

Health Professional #3

To be honest, I wasn’t expecting much from the dietician. I’ve never had a lot of luck with them and I don’t quite know what their purpose is. Different food groups? Got it. I understand the whole concept, yet every dietician that I’ve talked to seems to think that a balanced diet is news to me. What? Fruits AND vegetables? Tell me more!

OK, in all fairness, I don’t actually subscribe to the food pyramid theory. I don’t tell dieticians that, of course. Because I want to leave the office at some point. Regardless, I was determined to go in with an open mind.

At the appointment, we discussed River’s diet, the changes we’ve made, and the results. The dietician shared my concern that River didn’t eat enough of a variety. I mentioned that I’ve tried the classic “hide the veggie” tricks like meatballs, soups, and smoothies. The dietician asked if I’ve ever tried smoothies. I repeated that she doesn’t like smoothies. We spent the rest of the visit looking at a web page of potential smoothie combinations. As if I’d never heard of Pinterest.

Sigh. Just give me the stupid referral so I can leave already.

Health Professional #4

We finally made it to the pediatrician. I told him River’s symptoms; he said he didn’t think she was celiac but it worth testing. He told me to give her something with gluten every day for the next 6 weeks – preferably 8 – and then get the blood work done. We left the doctor’s offices and drove straight to Tim Hortons for a donut.

River was in heaven.